Alone

And so they said that true friend is the one who stays by your side in good time and bad time. But, I have to offend that theory. I’ve been trying my best to not complaining to my friend about how bad the day I’ve been through. I don’t also spit on social media just to let the world knows that I’m in pain.
No, I’m not that kind of person.
Sometimes, I do feel like wanting accompanies just to ease the pain. But, most of the time there’s an absence of the companion. Either they’re busy or they just couldn’t feel the urgencies of my mending heart. In the end, I have to rely on myself to wipe my own tears.


Pathetic?
On the gloomy nights like today, it does feels painful. But, on my mostly cheerful days, it’s nothing. Why would I bother to spread the poison to my friends? Since they are important people in my life, I’d better keep silence to let the never notice the hardship. I mean, you don’t want your beloved ones to be worried, right?
Afterall, I can handle it. I’m used to be alone. I just read Usui’s blog on how he went to Karaoke alone because he lacks of close friends. I feel our similarity.  I’ve been spending 70 percent of my time working that I just had 30 percent left to take rest. Taking rest is important, but that means I have to sacrifice socialization. Ah
Am I not happy? I don’t know. I smile every single day. I laugh sincerely. I seldom think about my loneliness except for this kind of time when I should be sleeping but still waiting for the mac to be fully charged. Idle time makes you think of unimportant things.