When I call you, it means I need you to listen

After starting to read the book of Susan Cain, "Quiet", I'm convinced that I'm an ambivert. There was moment when I thought I was extrovert. I think it was in my high school time. When you were in school, you had  (almost) the same time schedule with your classmates. Thus, it made friendship strangled in groups. I had some friends I spent time with. At that moment, happiness meant to be with lots of people.

However, when I entered university, my classmates spreader in various classes. I tended to stick with certain people I met regularly in same classes. The same thing happened in master years. Being with lots of people started to feel suffocated. People don't listen to other people. They only hear what they want to hear.

When I was in my last year of master education, I made training plan about active listening. Since active listening required energy, it's tiresome. Thus, there are not many people who knows this. And even if they knew, some just choose to ignore it. Like me. Sometimes I just ignore the importance of doing active listening. I know. 

As we grow older, the piles of problems arise. On the contrary, we have less friend we can rely on. I believe we can't keep our problems alone. None can. You need to let them go, giving space for new problems. Some fools spit them on social media, sharing negative feelings to other netizens. But, I think those who complains in Facebook and similar sites are those without friends (or at least reliable friend) and is having serious potency of narcism. It's dangerous. Just like ebola, bad words is contagious.

So, I promise myself to not letting people spreading their illness on social media. When someone asks me for lunch, I take it as sign that she/he wants to talk about her/his problems. It's my deed to humanity since I don't take the psychologist path. At least I can lean my ear. I take their words as secret.

I want to be treated the same. When I ask someone out, it means I need to share. And I don't ask people much. So, it's so sad when someone reject my invitation. But, can't help it, right?